Tuesday, June 05, 2007
ramblings of a lapsed anarchist
"...clearly your love of the halflings leaf has clouded your mind..."
and so it is we find ourselves adrift in the world, driven to do mundane things for reasons long forgotten, and all the while wondering what it is that we really should be doing, or further still what exactly should the basis for any of our actions be. what the fuck are beliefs anyway? and further more who the fuck believes them!? yet it becomes all to clear to us when we are doing something we shouldn't be. maybe. can't speak for others i guess.
saw a photo of a friend i haven't seen for ten years on the most perfect waves somewhere i don't even know (arran you bastard!), and i just thought to myself, there's a really cool frood who really knows where his towel is, if you get my drift. feel like i have been caught in a reality not of my own devising, even though it pretty much was all of my own devising. not that its a bad reality, but i wonder if my children are growing up with a fair representation of who i am, but then again maybe they don't need to see the madness that is the life on the low road. life decisions fueled by the wisdom of bukowski, thompson, kesey and gull alder. yet that non-alter ego still comes out to flash his teeth and partake in those dangerous pursuits in the dark underbelly that is margies after dark! not as often as he would like!
which brings me back to where i started this - why the fuck do we do the things we do, when it seems clear to me that i can't really blame my rationality. lets face it, whatever intentions we have for our actions, or desires, it is not often that we actually defer to them, or even successfully be swayed by them subconsiously. or when we do, they seldom have the outcomes we thought so important to begin with. i think i might revive my old anthill theory, which suggests whatever it is that we think governs our actions in the world, it is really our collective consciosness dictating actions through the use of subtle pherome triggers. there is much more to it than that, but thats the gist of it.
hmm, i'll meditate on that i think..........
and so it is we find ourselves adrift in the world, driven to do mundane things for reasons long forgotten, and all the while wondering what it is that we really should be doing, or further still what exactly should the basis for any of our actions be. what the fuck are beliefs anyway? and further more who the fuck believes them!? yet it becomes all to clear to us when we are doing something we shouldn't be. maybe. can't speak for others i guess.
saw a photo of a friend i haven't seen for ten years on the most perfect waves somewhere i don't even know (arran you bastard!), and i just thought to myself, there's a really cool frood who really knows where his towel is, if you get my drift. feel like i have been caught in a reality not of my own devising, even though it pretty much was all of my own devising. not that its a bad reality, but i wonder if my children are growing up with a fair representation of who i am, but then again maybe they don't need to see the madness that is the life on the low road. life decisions fueled by the wisdom of bukowski, thompson, kesey and gull alder. yet that non-alter ego still comes out to flash his teeth and partake in those dangerous pursuits in the dark underbelly that is margies after dark! not as often as he would like!
which brings me back to where i started this - why the fuck do we do the things we do, when it seems clear to me that i can't really blame my rationality. lets face it, whatever intentions we have for our actions, or desires, it is not often that we actually defer to them, or even successfully be swayed by them subconsiously. or when we do, they seldom have the outcomes we thought so important to begin with. i think i might revive my old anthill theory, which suggests whatever it is that we think governs our actions in the world, it is really our collective consciosness dictating actions through the use of subtle pherome triggers. there is much more to it than that, but thats the gist of it.
hmm, i'll meditate on that i think..........
Back in Black - and Blue!
Yes I'm back - all fraud-banded at home and ready to rock and roll!
Photo? They don't call it silly mid-off for nothing!
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